When Past Strikes

You’re going about your day, focused, maybe even content. Sunlight streams through the window as you talk with a friend or concentrate on a task. Then, without warning, a familiar song plays in the background, or catch the faintest scent of something that once meant everything. Heat floods your chest, your stomach twists, and for a moment, you’re back in that memory. The surge of emotion hits like a punch, raw and unfiltered. It’s as if time collapses, pulling you out of the present, gripped by a weave of anger, sadness, or shame. This is a trigger loop- a powerful, involuntary cycle that reactivates past pain, keeping you emotionally locked in a moment that doesn’t belong to now.

Trigger loops can make us feel trapped, dragging us into repetitive, intense reactions tied to the past. But with self-awareness and a few strategies, I learned to break these cycles, reclaim my calm, and restore my power as a well-tuned woman. Here’s how:

1. Ground Yourself In The Present Moment

When a trigger pulls you back into a painful memory, it can feel overwhelming. The first step is to anchor yourself into the here and now. Take a deep breath, into your belly, press your feet firmly on the ground, or gently press your hands together. Focus on your immediate surroundings- the texture of your clothes, the coolness of the air, the steady rhythm of your breathing. This grounding exercise reminds you that you are safe , and that this moment is different from the past. Tuning in to the present pulls you out of the looping into a place of calm.

2. Acknowledge and Name Your Emotion

Tuning in also means facing the feeling directly, without judgement. Name your emtion-”I feel anger,” or “I feel sadness”- to create healthy distance from it. The act of labeling lets you observe the emotion instead of being taken over by it. Remember, the feeling is real, but it doesn't have to control you. By acknowledging it, you reclaim the power to respond intentionally.

3. Reframe the Experience as an Opportunity for Insight.

Ask yourself,, “What is this feeling trying to tell me?” Trigger loops often reveal unhealed wounds or boundaries that need strengthening. Reframing the experience as a chance from growth allows you to take ownership of it. When you explore what the trigger is showing you, you’re not just reacting- you’re learning, adapting, and tuning into what you truly need.

4. Set a New Pattern for Resilience

As a well-tuned woman, you have the power to reshape your responses. When a trigger arises, practice replacing your old reaction with a new response. This might mean taking a few deep breaths, focusing on a positive affirmation, or grounding yourself in a reminder of your strength , your joy, and your gratitude. Each time you consciously choose a new response, you weaken the trigger loop’s hold, making it we easier to stay centered and resilient.

5. Practice Self-Compassion Along the Way

Breaking free from trigger loops is a journey, not a quick fix. Give yourself the patience and compassion you’d offer a friend. Self compassion isn't just a way to feel better; it’s an act of courage that strengthens your resilience. Remind yourself that every step toward calm, every moment of awareness, is a victory in itself.

Reclaim Your Inner Peace

Trigger loops are intense, good, bad, or indifferent but you don’t have to live in their grip. By tuning in, grounding yourself, and transforming each experience into an opportunity for insight, you gain controller your responses. Remember, reclaiming peace is a process that takes patience, but each step forward brings you closer to a life led with intention, balance, and inner strength. As a well-tuned woman, you’re learning not only to navigate life’s storms bit to emerge from them with calm and confidence.

Journal Prompt:

Think about a recent time when you felt triggered. What specific event, sound, smell, or memory seen it off? How did your body respond, and what emotions came up? Reflect on what this might be telling you about an area of healing or growth. How could you respond differently next time to reclaim your sense of calm and control?